The Importance of Clear Goal Setting

It's resolution time...as if you didn't know that. Television commercials and talk shows are all pushing the fact that we must make resolutions at this time of the year.

It's not that I'm anti-resolution, it's that I want to have a more structured goal than a wish that I hope comes true in the new year.

So...I've been trying to decide how this is going to work...I've decided to have some activity goals to aspire to. Mainly some running/walking goals.

• March 5th: 5k Carrot Run
• May 1st: Flying Pig 13k
• August 21: Danskin Triathlon
• October: Run Like Hell 5k
• November 25: Thanksgiving Day 5k
• December 5: Jingle Bell 5k

A couple of tools that I have started using that you might want to try:

• DailyMile (to track walking/running program - it's free and is the source of my Donut Meter)
• FitDay (to track everything else - seriously, what a fantastic FREE program)

Other goals:

• 1286 calories per day until I reach my goal weight
• Yoga 3x per week
• Switch out weekday morning coffee to unsweetened tea

Self-esteem and Self-talk

I believe that negative self-talk can completely derail our plans for change. Years ago, I was really good about not engaging in that kind of behavior...but lately, I've realized that I have been doing a lot of negative self-talk.

My self-esteem has suffered a bit in the last 3 years. I don't know where or when or how it happened but my self-esteem is at an all time low. I really believe low self-esteem is a huge deterrent to reaching our goals.

So...how to boost self-esteem so that I can stay on track?

Look at negative self-talk. Try to be mindful of the times you are saying things that are not supporting your goals. This is really insideous so you are going to have to pay attention.

This morning, I was on the treadmill...do I need to go into how many times I tried to talk myself out of it?...I first woke up at 6:11am and had two thoughts, "oh, I slept good!" and "oh, there's still time to sleep!"

I was happy that I'd slept soundly (this is rare as I often wake up and toss and turn for a couple of hours) and I wanted more of it. But when my head hit the pillow, I had another thought, "I need to get up and get on the treadmill."

My response to that was less than positive.

I tried to go back to sleep but after arguing with myself, I finally got out of bed at 6:40. I went downstairs and into the kitchen. Instead of coffee, I made myself a cup of tea. Caught up on some email. And then put on my shoes just in time to step on my treadmill at the planned workout time.

As I'm typing this, I realize that I did something that changed this morning's outcome. As soon as I got out of bed, I put on my workout clothes!

And then, at 7:25, I had a positive thought, "If I don't do this now, I won't do it later. It's now or never." I put on my shoes and got on the treadmill.

1:58 seconds into it Negative Self -Talk sasheyed into the room. "Oh shit. I'm tired. I'm bored."

10:00 minutes into it, there she is again. "Only 10 minutes?? This is hard!"

But this time I responded with, "There's only 20 minutes left. I can do anything."

And a few minutes later, I added, "I can do anything. I can do anything I put my mind to."

Negative Self-talk said, "Yeah, you used to believe that but, not so much, anymore..."

I responded, "I can do anything."

Then it was just walking, walking, walking...

20 minutes into it, she was back, "Oh man, I am tired. 20 minutes is good, maybe we can be done now? You don't have to go crazy, you're just getting back into it..."

I cut her off, "There's only 10 more minutes. I can do anything."

This realization feels like a shift for me...a shift in perspective...that part of changing your mind to change your life thinking...


There's an exercise I read about that I wanted to share (p.54). It's an exercise called "At My Best...". The idea is to think about a time when you were at a healthy weight or were exercising regularly. Then you just complete the sentence/make a list, "At my best, here's how I am..."

So I thought I would share that list here.

At my best, here's how I am:

• full of energy, positive, smiley
• fun to be around, laugh a lot
• feel great, have energy all day, sleep soundly
• grounded, centered, relaxed and calm
• accomplish alot at work, enjoy good working relationships
• eat healthy and to meet nutrional needs
• am more connected to my partner, affectionate, supportive
• feel connected spiritually
• engage in daily yoga/meditation practice

The other self-esteem boosting exercise that I want to share is about listing out your strengths (p. 67). Basically, just make another list...

My strengths: What I am even if I don't always believe it or do it

Physical Attributes - nice hair, good feet, nice hands, pretty eyes, strong, healthy, energetic
Skills & Abilities - creative, smart, quick learner, multiple skill sets, writer, graphic designer, event planner, marketing strategy, teacher, artist, photographer, cook, gardener, quick thinker, organized
Personality Traits - kind, positive, compassionate, loyal friend, thoughtful, fun, easy to be with, strong, assertive

Okay...so talk about feeling like I'm being self-indulgent. I feel like it's important to talk about these things and actually do these things to change things...

If you're reading this and want to share your own lists, please do! We can take inspiration from each other.

Today - A Road Map

• Today I poured myself a big glass of water and vowed to drink at least 3 more.
• I filled up the Brita pitcher
• I took my multi-vitamin
• I put on my workout clothes and vowed to get my workout in
• Established clear goals

Yesterday I started cleaning out my clothes closet. I filled up 4 bags of clothes to take to Goodwill. These are nice clothes, for the most part...but they are clothes I no longer wear and, quite frankly, by the time they are back in season, then they will be too big for me. It is time to clear away all that is no longer working for me and to make room for new, fresh perspectives/energies. Going to tackle a few of the boxes down in the basement today.

It seems like there's a lot to do when you decide to take care of yourself...it almost feels overwhelming. It does feel overwhelming. Other things I should do today...dry brush, eat positive (organic/veggies/herbs/local), do some laundry, plan for tomorrow, pedicure, run errands...argh. It's not even 10:30.

Okay...deep breath. Everything is okay. Just go for a walk...

Blessed Yule ~ Merry Christmas ~ Happy New Year!

Hope everyone had a good holiday!

Perfect time of the year to look back...for a weightloss blogger, this can be an enlightening experience.

Guess what? I didn't lose a pound. Didn't gain either. I have maintained...so I guess that's better than gaining. If I felt better about myself then I probably wouldn't care so much about the number on the scale.

I am persistent though.

Assessment is done and I know what I need to do:

• Keep being persistent - consistency is key to making lasting change
• Drink more water
• Exercise, exercise, exercise
• Yoga/Meditative movement
• Take a multi-vitamin
• Eat to be healthy
• Work 8 hours a day and sleep 8 hours a day

The hardest thing, for me, is getting started. After forgetting to focus on myself for more than a year, my poor body feels so sluggish and, frankly, sick. This past year was really hard and stressful for me and it's written all over my body.

From January to the end of February, I was so stressed out over the direction my job was going in. I got the new position in March, which launched a whole other set of stressors. At the same time, my Mom was going in for her second surgery, and poor Hero was going down fast. The thing that was so hard, was that I knew I had to let her go before my Mom's surgery because I didn't want her to die while I was in St. Louis. It was such a difficult and emotional time.

My best friend at work quit and moved on to another position. I was still worried about the job I was doing and was trying to adapt to a new supervisor (who I adored!). We were so busy doing so many things...I was working at least 50-60 hour work weeks.

Another part of my life came to an end in May. It's such a private part of me that I really don't want to dissect it here but suffice to say, I lost some people who I thought were dear to me...basically, I broke off friendships with a group of ladies who were toxic for me. It's been a heartbreaking process but I don't know how I could have done any differently.

Physically, I did what I have done over the past 6 years...I forgot to put myself first. I self-medicated with wine and cheese and bread and cake. I didn't exercise because I felt so tired and depleted.

Along with the bad moments, there were good ones too...

• I finally got that promotion that I'd been wanting since starting that job
• We got a lot of stuff done on the house
• I finally started a veggie garden
• I started doing yoga on a more regular basis
• I got out of a toxic relationship that was damaging to my self-esteem

So what do I want for me in the new year? It's simple, I want to feel healthy. I want to have boundless energy. I want to put my health first. I want to progress in my career. I want to feel good when I wake up in the morning and I want to sleep soundly at night.

I don't know how I'm going to do it. I know that I've been saying, for the past 6 years, that I'm going to make a lasting change...I know that I have failed over and over with this...but this time...this time...I am going to make some lasting change in my life in the coming year. All of the change I intend to manifest will be positive and contribute to my overall health. This is my wish for the New Year...

Ohhh, the Fat Girl, she's tricky like Puck

If you read what I wrote last night you might have caught it. I didn't...not at first. But later I took my first bath in many many moons and while I was relaxing, it came to me...pretty ambitious morning before my root canal. I'd forgotten about the snow and that I'd need to clean off my car...which meant I'd need to get up at 5:30 to get everything done so that I could be at the dentist by 8:00am.

The Fat Girl does this...she will set me up so well so that I will immediately fail and then feel so bad that I just say, "Ef it! I'm eating cake!"

So what's the best I can do this morning? Get up at 6:00am...put on the kettle for my hot green tea, dress up warm and go out to dig out my car, come in and have the tea and some oatmeal for a good breakfast...get a shower/dressed and make my way, carefully - the roads are icy this morning, to the dentist.

I will be sure to, at least, meditate today.

So how's that? More realistic?

My Year End Vacation: Pushing the Restart Button

Another year is almost gone and, it appears, that my inner Fat Girl has won again.

The Fat Girl is a master manipulator and is so quick to bring up reasons why my inner Fit Girl can't work out or needs to eat that donut that day.

But, I gotta hand it to Fat Girl...she hasn't sabotaged my career (just my health). I think she likes to use it as a big excuse...that's why I'm often so tired and stressed out...too tired and stressed out to exercise, get to a yoga class, or even meditate.

But she didn't count on this end of the year vacation. And how this might strengthen Fit Girl's resolve to make a lasting change...once and for all.

So, tomorrow...I wake to start my day with Green Tea and organic fresh lemon juice. Then onto the treadmill. After treadmill, it's a healthy breakfast of steel cut oats with organic raisins and pecans and a touch of honey.

Then I have to leave the house in time to make it to my early morning dental appointment (8am). I want to get in the workout and breakfast first because I know I'm not going to feel like doing it later.

When I get home, I will take a nap or just rest. Something that is ABSOLUTELY forbidden? No checking work email. In fact, maybe I should change the settings on my Blackberry so that I don't get emails that way.

My goal, over vacation is to get into a routine where my health is a high priority for me. One that is not easily crossed off my 'to do' list because something else comes up or because the Fat Girl is tired or 'hungry' or 'wants a treat'...

I want to workout on my treadmill, do yoga, and meditate daily. I want to eat healthy and enjoy my holiday without the stress of work.

Do you think I can do it? Who's going to pull it out at the last minute: Fat Girl or Fit Girl???

It's a small thing...

This morning, I woke up and thought, oh coffee would be good. Maybe just one more morning, just this morning, I will have coffee...and tomorrow I'll have green tea with lemon.

Last night I made a lovely salmon salad for my lunch today. And I set up my morning station to make a cup of green tea with fresh lemon juice. I did that because I feel that my morning habit of coffee is so ritualized now...part of the pain of giving up that habit would be giving up the ritual of it.

You know...wake up, no thinking, just shuffle down to the kitchen, turn on the light over the stove, go over, rinse the coffee pot and fill with cold water, pour in coffee maker, rinse coffee grounds basket, measure out coffee, close basket, push on button, let Riley out. Get creamer out of refrigerator, set out clean coffee cup, get a small spoon from the silverware drawer, get a small glass ramiken down to hold the spoon. Set sugar bowl by coffee cup. Let Riley in. Place 1tsp organic sugar in cup. Pour in coffee. Pour in small amount of organic creamer, stir. Smell, sip.

I've done that practically every morning for probably 20 years (with a few differences, like it used to be Hero that I let out every morning).

So I thought that I would need to develop a little ritual for making the green tea. But when I woke up this morning, I thought about those cookies that Cathy had brought home from the holiday party and how they'd be good with a cup of coffee. And I thought, "I don't have to not drink coffee this morning because I need to eat one of those cookies because they are here."

But the thing is...and stay with me because I know this is going to sound weird...I dreamed that I packed a backpack and went on a quest...I was looking for a woman...a real guru...and like you do in dreams, she appeared and started showing me things...completely inexplicable things like goldfish walking on stilts on the land...dozens of images like that...and she said, "the body is an amazing thing and adapts to what we need..." and then she looked at me and said, "you are perfect already...you have everything...get to that perfection."

So when I was lying in bed this morning and thinking I would have coffee this morning instead of green tea, I thought about that dream and I thought, 'okay, just this morning, I'm going to have green tea with lemon instead of coffee with sugar."

It's a small thing, I know...but a first step on the journey to giving up refined sugar.