"What have you done, today, to make you feel proud?"
~Theme song by Heather Small
The Biggest Loser (TBL) starts again next week. I have not missed an episode of this show since it started a couple of years ago. Sad, but true. ;>
To be honest, though, I have to say that I can be fairly snarky when it come to the show. But I also find some motivation in it as well. I mean, yes, I'm fully aware that the contestants take off work for 3 months...leave their families...their lives...behind while they go to "the BL ranch" to work out and eat healthy and be motivated by being on TV and working with others who are in the same boat. So, really, who couldn't meet their weight loss goals in circumstances such as that??? (The contestants get on my nerves when they say, "If I can do it, anyone can do it!" because...shut up! You're at an adult fat camp....of course you can do it!)
But. I do watch it and do find some motivation in the show. I adore Jillian and I can usually pick up a new kind of exercise here and there. But what really motivates me is watching these contestants change right before my eyes. It makes what I'm trying to do more concrete.
What I'd like to do this season is to have my own little Biggest Loser Challenge. I'd like to set several goals to meet each week and set up challenges here that I will try here as well. There are 19 episodes scheduled and it might be interesting to see what I can do in 19 weeks.
I'm thinking that I could post a photo of myself each week (a la BL style...maybe not in a sports bra and biking shorts...but in my workout outfit...seriously, it's too freaking cold here to wear that little clothing!).
I'll post what I've lost at each weigh in every week with my goal being to lose 1-2 pounds a week. (Yeah, yeah, I know it's not BL weight loss but I want to set reasonable goals that I can actually attain...you know, since I can't actually set my burn to 5000 cals a day!).
I'll have a workout goal each week and try to match at least one of the challenges they do for each episode. So, for example, I am pretty sure that the first episode of this season will find our challengers walking 1 mile. So I'll measure out a mile in my neighborhood and try to run it. (I've been working out for a few months so I know I can walk it as I usually walk 3 miles at each workout...but I haven't run that far yet, so I'll make that my challenge). If they do an obstacle course, then I'll set up a challenge for myself like that...and so on.
I'll post a short recap of the episode each week along with my own results...so watch this space!
Want to join me? I don't have $250k to give away but I could give away a percentage of that...$25. Of course, then you'd have to send me your weight each week and send a photo of yourself as well. And, it would be an honor system...but since the prize would only be a fraction of TBL prize, I trust you. Besides that...the real prize will be losing 19-40 pounds and changing your life!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
How to fix a flat...
"When you get a flat tire, you don't get out and slash the other three tires, do you? NOOOO! You change the tire, then go on your way!
~Jillian Michaels
Soooo. ;>
Yes, I got a flat tire. I ran over something and from December 4th until now, I gained 5 pounds. Now, granted...I'm at my moontime. It's probably not 5 pounds of fat...surely there's a pound or so of "water" weight in there as well.
I am not freaking out about it. I'm just going on. Because, I really understand now that there are going to be times in my life when I'm going to have a slip. As the saying goes, "shit happens."
If I look on the surface, I can tell you that this month has been very stressful for me...moreso that usual. Heh. And it's been very busy...in every aspect. At work, it was our second busiest December ever (which is the busiest month of the year). And at home, of course, we were running around trying to get so much done before the Solstice and Christmas. And, in the end, I hit that wall of being tired. Exhausted.
If I look deeper, I see that I need to learn to "go with the flow" more often. I need to figure out how to stop swimming against the currents that are constantly moving against me.
I'm not really sure how to do that.
Maybe more meditation, more yoga? Maybe focusing on my priority list? But it seems that I often put myself first. Well, maybe...but when I look back at this last month, I see that I spent a lot of time doing things for other people. And quite often I didn't put my basic needs first (exercise and meditation/stress-relief).
So, New Year's Resolutions? Perhaps it would be to keep my basic needs at the top of my priority list. And if I can meet those needs, then maybe I need to take a look at my schedule and cut out something that I'm doing for others (particularly when I'm not getting anything out of it).
I hate to sound selfish. But isn't that what we're all afraid of? I mean, don't you think that often, women in this country, girls...are raised to the refrain of, "..don't be so selfish!" We are taught that we must always put the needs of others before our own. It's such a hard habit to break. Because we love the people in our lives and we want to make everything better for them...so we put ourselves last on our priority list because we want to feed our children and spouses what they want and we end up giving so much of ourselves that we have nothing to give ourselves. Even if we don't have kids. I can't tell you how many days I come home from work so freaking tired of taking care of everyone else...stroking their ego, trying to make them feel better about themselves or trying not to piss someone off or just trying to deal with exhausting personalities...that when I get home, I have nothing else to give. I'm so tried of giving my spouse what's left of me. Doesn't she deserve the best of me? Don't I?
So how do I change this flat tire? I guess it's about finding balance, I guess. I must stop driving over all the stuff that takes me off the road, off track.
~Jillian Michaels
Soooo. ;>
Yes, I got a flat tire. I ran over something and from December 4th until now, I gained 5 pounds. Now, granted...I'm at my moontime. It's probably not 5 pounds of fat...surely there's a pound or so of "water" weight in there as well.
I am not freaking out about it. I'm just going on. Because, I really understand now that there are going to be times in my life when I'm going to have a slip. As the saying goes, "shit happens."
If I look on the surface, I can tell you that this month has been very stressful for me...moreso that usual. Heh. And it's been very busy...in every aspect. At work, it was our second busiest December ever (which is the busiest month of the year). And at home, of course, we were running around trying to get so much done before the Solstice and Christmas. And, in the end, I hit that wall of being tired. Exhausted.
If I look deeper, I see that I need to learn to "go with the flow" more often. I need to figure out how to stop swimming against the currents that are constantly moving against me.
I'm not really sure how to do that.
Maybe more meditation, more yoga? Maybe focusing on my priority list? But it seems that I often put myself first. Well, maybe...but when I look back at this last month, I see that I spent a lot of time doing things for other people. And quite often I didn't put my basic needs first (exercise and meditation/stress-relief).
So, New Year's Resolutions? Perhaps it would be to keep my basic needs at the top of my priority list. And if I can meet those needs, then maybe I need to take a look at my schedule and cut out something that I'm doing for others (particularly when I'm not getting anything out of it).
I hate to sound selfish. But isn't that what we're all afraid of? I mean, don't you think that often, women in this country, girls...are raised to the refrain of, "..don't be so selfish!" We are taught that we must always put the needs of others before our own. It's such a hard habit to break. Because we love the people in our lives and we want to make everything better for them...so we put ourselves last on our priority list because we want to feed our children and spouses what they want and we end up giving so much of ourselves that we have nothing to give ourselves. Even if we don't have kids. I can't tell you how many days I come home from work so freaking tired of taking care of everyone else...stroking their ego, trying to make them feel better about themselves or trying not to piss someone off or just trying to deal with exhausting personalities...that when I get home, I have nothing else to give. I'm so tried of giving my spouse what's left of me. Doesn't she deserve the best of me? Don't I?
So how do I change this flat tire? I guess it's about finding balance, I guess. I must stop driving over all the stuff that takes me off the road, off track.
Monday, December 7, 2009
A new goal to achieve for New Year...
"So hold this feeling like a newborn
All the freedom surging through your veins
You have opened up a new door
So bring on the wind, fire and rain..."
~Missy Higgins, Steer
Having a short term goal is important and my new one is multifaceted. Goals, I think, help me to stay motivated and on track. When the times come where I want to say, "Screw this!" and blow off my plan for a week, it is helpful for me to think about what it is I'm trying to achieve. That actually may have more to do with long term goals but setting short term goals helps me to get there. But just to be clear...what are my long term goals? Let me give you a list:
-lose 65 pounds (yes, this has changed...originally it was 50)
-establish long term exercise plan (ideally, I'd like to run 3 miles in 35 mins 5x a week and practice yoga 5x a week)
-establish a healthy lifelong eating plan
-fit in a size 7 pair of True Religion jeans (my goal jeans!)
So my short term goal? 175lb at New Year. At my last weigh in (on Friday morning), I was at 181. That's 1.5 lbs a week. Doable, I'd say but considering I was loosing a pound a week for a while there, it is going to take a little more effort to hit 1.5 a week. Thus, the circuit workout.
I started doing circuit training this morning. We have a small home gym in the basement and it is perfect for the circuit training that Jillian Michaels suggests on her website. I've tried to incorporate it at the gym but they just aren't set up for that kind of workout there. At home, I have an elliptical that I can hop on for the aerobic portion of each circuit. And there's space right beside it for me to do the floor exercises/weight exercises of each circuit.
So why crank up the intensity? I would like to say because I am just feeling like now is the time. But there's probably more to it...
I have had a taste of success...losing a significant portion of weight...10% is no mean feat! By the way, I took two measurements this morning and I've lost 3 inches in both my waist and hips. So this taste of success is motivating to me. I want to get fitter! And I think upping the intensity is going to bring more success.
But I'm also starting the circuit training because it really makes me feel strong. And I want to start seeing some definition in my arms and legs. And I want to give my metabolism a boost. AND, when I work out in the mornings, it sets a positive intention for the day...I feel better. I haven't been getting to the gym in the mornings to treadmill, so I thought just getting up and going down to the basement gym is something that is completely doable. (And wouldn't you know it...I woke up to snow on the ground this morning...great incentive to stay home and not go outside).
The other piece of the workout...cardio, I will still do at the gym because guess what? I like the treadmill. I always have and have always been most successful at keeping a long term exercise plan when I've used the treadmill. So I'm still going to do that but will go in the evenings after work. My goal this week is to hit my 500 calorie burn through it (with the circuit as bonus calories burned).
And there's another piece to my workout puzzle...it's yoga. So yesterday I met with this lady, Tiffany, who is a yin yoga teacher. She came to the house to give me a personal yoga class. (Believe me! It was a really good deal because she's currently between yoga gigs after just having a baby!). I'd really like to see if she's interested in trading massage for a yoga class once a month but that's a whole other post! So the yoga class was really good. It's the kind of restorative yoga practice that I've been wanting to develop and reminds me of those days so long ago (I was about 12-13 years old) when I would stretch and luxuriate in my flexibility. So I am excited about having finally found a practice that resonates with me.
I'm not looking much beyond this short term goal. I will re-evaluate come January 1st. Getting through the holidays losing weight rather than gaining will be a true testament to my plan! But...just maybe I'll be fitting into those goal jeans by my 46th birthday...
All the freedom surging through your veins
You have opened up a new door
So bring on the wind, fire and rain..."
~Missy Higgins, Steer
Having a short term goal is important and my new one is multifaceted. Goals, I think, help me to stay motivated and on track. When the times come where I want to say, "Screw this!" and blow off my plan for a week, it is helpful for me to think about what it is I'm trying to achieve. That actually may have more to do with long term goals but setting short term goals helps me to get there. But just to be clear...what are my long term goals? Let me give you a list:
-lose 65 pounds (yes, this has changed...originally it was 50)
-establish long term exercise plan (ideally, I'd like to run 3 miles in 35 mins 5x a week and practice yoga 5x a week)
-establish a healthy lifelong eating plan
-fit in a size 7 pair of True Religion jeans (my goal jeans!)
So my short term goal? 175lb at New Year. At my last weigh in (on Friday morning), I was at 181. That's 1.5 lbs a week. Doable, I'd say but considering I was loosing a pound a week for a while there, it is going to take a little more effort to hit 1.5 a week. Thus, the circuit workout.
I started doing circuit training this morning. We have a small home gym in the basement and it is perfect for the circuit training that Jillian Michaels suggests on her website. I've tried to incorporate it at the gym but they just aren't set up for that kind of workout there. At home, I have an elliptical that I can hop on for the aerobic portion of each circuit. And there's space right beside it for me to do the floor exercises/weight exercises of each circuit.
So why crank up the intensity? I would like to say because I am just feeling like now is the time. But there's probably more to it...
I have had a taste of success...losing a significant portion of weight...10% is no mean feat! By the way, I took two measurements this morning and I've lost 3 inches in both my waist and hips. So this taste of success is motivating to me. I want to get fitter! And I think upping the intensity is going to bring more success.
But I'm also starting the circuit training because it really makes me feel strong. And I want to start seeing some definition in my arms and legs. And I want to give my metabolism a boost. AND, when I work out in the mornings, it sets a positive intention for the day...I feel better. I haven't been getting to the gym in the mornings to treadmill, so I thought just getting up and going down to the basement gym is something that is completely doable. (And wouldn't you know it...I woke up to snow on the ground this morning...great incentive to stay home and not go outside).
The other piece of the workout...cardio, I will still do at the gym because guess what? I like the treadmill. I always have and have always been most successful at keeping a long term exercise plan when I've used the treadmill. So I'm still going to do that but will go in the evenings after work. My goal this week is to hit my 500 calorie burn through it (with the circuit as bonus calories burned).
And there's another piece to my workout puzzle...it's yoga. So yesterday I met with this lady, Tiffany, who is a yin yoga teacher. She came to the house to give me a personal yoga class. (Believe me! It was a really good deal because she's currently between yoga gigs after just having a baby!). I'd really like to see if she's interested in trading massage for a yoga class once a month but that's a whole other post! So the yoga class was really good. It's the kind of restorative yoga practice that I've been wanting to develop and reminds me of those days so long ago (I was about 12-13 years old) when I would stretch and luxuriate in my flexibility. So I am excited about having finally found a practice that resonates with me.
I'm not looking much beyond this short term goal. I will re-evaluate come January 1st. Getting through the holidays losing weight rather than gaining will be a true testament to my plan! But...just maybe I'll be fitting into those goal jeans by my 46th birthday...
Friday, December 4, 2009
I'm On My Way, Can't Stop Me Now...
"I look into the window of my mind
Reflections of the fears I know I've left behind
I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I am on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same..."
~ "Proud" by Heather Small
I weighed today and I've lost another 2 pounds!
I am so happy about that. And I am proud of that. For the past two weeks, through the Thanksgiving holidays and the following rough moon-time week, I've lost a total of 4 pounds. I was careful to eat healthy and to stick with my exercise plan. And I'm so pleased that I was able to care for myself that way.
And I am finally seeing the results in my clothes. My favorite jeans are now a bit too big. Some shirts that were kind of too tight are now fitting much better! I'm very excited to start seeing my clothes fit better. As the pounds lost start to add up, I'm more and more confident that I can reach my goal of losing 50 pounds.
Currently, I haven't even lost half of that but I'm getting there. I am hoping to have lost 25 pounds by the New Year. As of today, I've lost 19 pounds. Nineteen pounds. That is incredible to me. After 3-4 years of yo-yo-ing with 7 pounds...I've finally broken through.
I'm really feeling like I've made a lasting change. I've had a spiritual awakening...I've begun to look at food differently. I think about cake...cake that I have craved so much through the years...and it kind of grosses me out now...now that I know what's in it. If I'm going to eat something that high in calories, I really want it to be good...not just a bunch of corn derivitives like high fructose corn syrup and other crap.
This weekend is my long work-outs weekend and I'm looking forward to it. I've started ending those long workouts with a meditation in the sauna and steam room at my gym...and that feels like a real treat to me. AND, this weekend, I'm taking my first Yin Yoga class. I'm hoping that it is the kind of yoga practice I've been looking for. I'm feeling like I want to do some slow, gentle, meditative yoga that focuses on restorative poses. I'm hoping Yin Yoga will give me that.
And...you are hearing it here first...I'm going to start my circuit training on Monday at my home gym. The gym I go to is just not set up for circuit training...I can do it more easily at home. So I'm going to set up the home gym this weekend to be ready for my circuit training (4x a week). I am thinking I will do it in the mornings and then go to the gym in the evenings to do my cardio. This regimen will really up my exercise intensity and increase my metabolism like crazy. I'm going to give it a shot for the next few weeks to see how it goes and will report back here on my progress.
Until then...if you are dieting along with me or have just been following along with my blog, drop me a note and let me know how you are doing or what you'd like to read about on this blog.
Reflections of the fears I know I've left behind
I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I am on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same..."
~ "Proud" by Heather Small
I weighed today and I've lost another 2 pounds!
I am so happy about that. And I am proud of that. For the past two weeks, through the Thanksgiving holidays and the following rough moon-time week, I've lost a total of 4 pounds. I was careful to eat healthy and to stick with my exercise plan. And I'm so pleased that I was able to care for myself that way.
And I am finally seeing the results in my clothes. My favorite jeans are now a bit too big. Some shirts that were kind of too tight are now fitting much better! I'm very excited to start seeing my clothes fit better. As the pounds lost start to add up, I'm more and more confident that I can reach my goal of losing 50 pounds.
Currently, I haven't even lost half of that but I'm getting there. I am hoping to have lost 25 pounds by the New Year. As of today, I've lost 19 pounds. Nineteen pounds. That is incredible to me. After 3-4 years of yo-yo-ing with 7 pounds...I've finally broken through.
I'm really feeling like I've made a lasting change. I've had a spiritual awakening...I've begun to look at food differently. I think about cake...cake that I have craved so much through the years...and it kind of grosses me out now...now that I know what's in it. If I'm going to eat something that high in calories, I really want it to be good...not just a bunch of corn derivitives like high fructose corn syrup and other crap.
This weekend is my long work-outs weekend and I'm looking forward to it. I've started ending those long workouts with a meditation in the sauna and steam room at my gym...and that feels like a real treat to me. AND, this weekend, I'm taking my first Yin Yoga class. I'm hoping that it is the kind of yoga practice I've been looking for. I'm feeling like I want to do some slow, gentle, meditative yoga that focuses on restorative poses. I'm hoping Yin Yoga will give me that.
And...you are hearing it here first...I'm going to start my circuit training on Monday at my home gym. The gym I go to is just not set up for circuit training...I can do it more easily at home. So I'm going to set up the home gym this weekend to be ready for my circuit training (4x a week). I am thinking I will do it in the mornings and then go to the gym in the evenings to do my cardio. This regimen will really up my exercise intensity and increase my metabolism like crazy. I'm going to give it a shot for the next few weeks to see how it goes and will report back here on my progress.
Until then...if you are dieting along with me or have just been following along with my blog, drop me a note and let me know how you are doing or what you'd like to read about on this blog.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Things Really Do Change...
"Things do not change; we change."
~Henry David Thoreau
Hah...so maybe I have really changed!
I think back to the things that I've changed in my life over the past few years: qutting drinking diet soda, quitting smoking, and quitting eating processed food.
These are things that have changed so much. I used to be so addicted to diet soda...all I drank was diet coke or diet dr. pepper. I'd drink 2 2liters a day. Can you imagine? And I LOVED it! I wonder how much money I spent on soda with a habit like that for almost 30 years? I quit drinking diet soda over 2 years ago. It has almost been 3 years. I can't believe it has been that long. I don't miss it at all. And the couple of times that I've tried to drink a soda it has tasted so horrible that it's actually kind of shocking. The taste of that fake sugar is so nasty. I can't believe that I ever loved the taste of that crap.
What do I drink now? Unsweetened organic iced tea, soda water (nothing in it but water!), filtered tap water, and wine (or the occasional beer). And miracle of miracles, I love water! Just plain, filtered cold water is fantastic.
Just a few words on quitting smoking...I can't believe I was ever a smoker. It's so gross...which I knew but didn't really appreciate how smelly it really is. I can smell a smoker or a lit cigarette so quickly now. I can't believe I ever let myself smell like an ashtray and god knows what I was doing to my lungs (well, I know because I developed asthma!).
Quitting processed foods though...now that is a whole new world for me. For so long, especially in my 20s, I ate so much fast food. And it's been almost my whole life that I ate tons of processed foods. In my 20s and 30s I practically lived on Lean Cuisines and Weight Watchers meals. Now just the thought of them grosses me out. I can't believe I made myself eat those little boxes of processed foods. Sooo much sodium and corn and corn derivatives and such tiny portions. Since I've started eating clean, whole foods, I feel so much better. And I feel cared for in a way that those little tv dinners never made me feel. When I ate those I felt deprived. I felt like I was on a diet. Yet, ironically, I didn't end up losing weight no matter how many of them I ate (I used to eat one every day for lunch!).
I have finally lost the taste for processed food. Like I used to eat peanut butter like Jiff or Skippy...and now it tastes like candy fluff...peanut-butter flavored fluff. I love real nut butters...nothing but ground nuts and a little salt...tastes like peanut butter, not candy.
This morning, I woke up late. I didn't have time to make my usual cup of organic coffee so I decided to stop at McDonald's for my caffeine fix...a large unsweetened iced tea (no styrofoam! at least I can recycle the plastic cup!) and as I pulled out of the drive thru I thought, "Wow...it's been a really long time since I stopped there in the morning." I thought about it for a minute...used to be a time when I would have McDonald's for breakfast every morning (bacon, egg and cheese biscuit with a side of hash browns and a large SWEET iced tea -- don't even get me started on this...suffice to say, read the first part of Omnivore's Dilemma to learn how all of that is just corn and corn derivatives...a high calorie/high fat/high fructose corn syrup meal!). Now I have zero desire to eat something like that. Not saying that I would NEVER eat a McD's meal again...but the craving for that kind of food is gone.
This transformation...these changes...are nothing short of magic that I have worked in this past year!
~Henry David Thoreau
Hah...so maybe I have really changed!
I think back to the things that I've changed in my life over the past few years: qutting drinking diet soda, quitting smoking, and quitting eating processed food.
These are things that have changed so much. I used to be so addicted to diet soda...all I drank was diet coke or diet dr. pepper. I'd drink 2 2liters a day. Can you imagine? And I LOVED it! I wonder how much money I spent on soda with a habit like that for almost 30 years? I quit drinking diet soda over 2 years ago. It has almost been 3 years. I can't believe it has been that long. I don't miss it at all. And the couple of times that I've tried to drink a soda it has tasted so horrible that it's actually kind of shocking. The taste of that fake sugar is so nasty. I can't believe that I ever loved the taste of that crap.
What do I drink now? Unsweetened organic iced tea, soda water (nothing in it but water!), filtered tap water, and wine (or the occasional beer). And miracle of miracles, I love water! Just plain, filtered cold water is fantastic.
Just a few words on quitting smoking...I can't believe I was ever a smoker. It's so gross...which I knew but didn't really appreciate how smelly it really is. I can smell a smoker or a lit cigarette so quickly now. I can't believe I ever let myself smell like an ashtray and god knows what I was doing to my lungs (well, I know because I developed asthma!).
Quitting processed foods though...now that is a whole new world for me. For so long, especially in my 20s, I ate so much fast food. And it's been almost my whole life that I ate tons of processed foods. In my 20s and 30s I practically lived on Lean Cuisines and Weight Watchers meals. Now just the thought of them grosses me out. I can't believe I made myself eat those little boxes of processed foods. Sooo much sodium and corn and corn derivatives and such tiny portions. Since I've started eating clean, whole foods, I feel so much better. And I feel cared for in a way that those little tv dinners never made me feel. When I ate those I felt deprived. I felt like I was on a diet. Yet, ironically, I didn't end up losing weight no matter how many of them I ate (I used to eat one every day for lunch!).
I have finally lost the taste for processed food. Like I used to eat peanut butter like Jiff or Skippy...and now it tastes like candy fluff...peanut-butter flavored fluff. I love real nut butters...nothing but ground nuts and a little salt...tastes like peanut butter, not candy.
This morning, I woke up late. I didn't have time to make my usual cup of organic coffee so I decided to stop at McDonald's for my caffeine fix...a large unsweetened iced tea (no styrofoam! at least I can recycle the plastic cup!) and as I pulled out of the drive thru I thought, "Wow...it's been a really long time since I stopped there in the morning." I thought about it for a minute...used to be a time when I would have McDonald's for breakfast every morning (bacon, egg and cheese biscuit with a side of hash browns and a large SWEET iced tea -- don't even get me started on this...suffice to say, read the first part of Omnivore's Dilemma to learn how all of that is just corn and corn derivatives...a high calorie/high fat/high fructose corn syrup meal!). Now I have zero desire to eat something like that. Not saying that I would NEVER eat a McD's meal again...but the craving for that kind of food is gone.
This transformation...these changes...are nothing short of magic that I have worked in this past year!
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